CGN Newsletter #53 – Aug. 19, 2022
I KNOW WHAT THAT IS!!
Rich Evans Plays RLM Video Game
Someone has made an unofficial Red Letter Media video game, and Rich Evans has played through it so that you don't have to.
Super VHS allows you to wander around the cavernous RLM studio, exploring the sets of their popular YouTube shows and collecting horrible VHS tapes. Once you collect 50 tapes, you unlock a laser gun from RLM's terrible feature film Space Cop, and you can lay waste to the workplace of the infamous Milwaukee slobs.
Super VHS is a free, 3-gigabyte download, available here.
VICE: Tim Curry's Communist Space Quest Explained
VICE's gaming vertical Motherboard has published an in-depth interview and analysis feature on a brief viral clip from Red Alert 3. You know the one – the clip where Tim Curry, pretending to be a Soviet general, declares that he's going to escape to the one place uncorrupted by capitalism: SPACE.
According to the experts, however, Curry's hopes of finding a socialist paradise amongst the stars are ill-conceived.
MICHAEL PACHTER: It is likely that space will be colonized by capitalists.
RON GARAN (former NASA astronaut): The idea that we can escape anything by going to space is a fallacy. We will bring with us to launchpad all the problems, challenges, inequities, and injustices that define the human condition.
The article also has extensive commentary from Westwood veterans – Curry did NOT flub the line, and he got that classic performance on his very first take. You can read it here.
Killable Civilians Confirmed for Cruelty Squad Sequel
Ville Kallio has discovered the secret to game development motivation: killing civilians.
Kallio, the creator of the cult hit Cruelty Squad, has made so much money from his breakthrough game that he was able to buy an apartment outright. A very, very nice apartment.
Yet when the time came to make his sophomore production, the Finno-Ugric gamedev demigod struggled to garner the motivation to do so, since his every material need is now provided for.
Kallio has been questing for some time to find a way to restore his mojo, and it turned out that all he needed was mindless (virtual) cruelty to innocent bystanders.
His as-yet untitled new game is still in the very early stages of development, but I have every confidence that its quality will match, if not surpass that of Cruelty Squad.
Regiments Out Now
MicroProse's new alternate timeline 1989 WW3 tactical RTS game Regiments is out now.
Lead your Regiment through the inferno of a wide-scale Cold War conflict in this new Real-Time Tactics game. Break through the lines, call in artillery and air support, maneuver, feign retreats, and stage mobile defenses. Do not relent.
The Platoon Command system lets you orchestrate battles with unprecedented precision and ease. No need to micromanage every infantryman - you're a Commanding Officer, not a sergeant.
More details here.
Mrs. Bleszinski Returns to Twitch
After a five year hiatus, Cliffy B's beautiful wife Lauren has returned to Twitch streaming.
In unrelated news, Cliffy B recently sold his spacious downtown condo, and has been complaining about the routine maintenance costs of his palatial bungalow...
The Best Gaming Tweets of the Week
